Asian Journal- The Filipino-American Community Newspaper

"Discovering who you truly are is the only way to find and keep a permanent sense of self-esteem. Only a deep and thorough knowledge of ourselves will give us the unshakable sense of self that can stand up to the rigors of life in the twenty-first century." - Gay Hendricks

When Nikki Nepales walked in the door, dressed in understated tones of gray, a black sheath dress with a sweater and black leather high heels, I figured her for a fashionista -- just like her mother, Janet.

I only realized the impact of the kind of upbringing her parents(Ruben and Janet) did in developing her persona when she started sharing the depth of wisdom that she has acquired from them -- wisdom that is clearly beyond her age.

At age 21, Nikki has already derived so much wisdom from embracing spiritual challenges as they came. Her human spirit became more aligned, and in the process, made her elegance and depth shine ever so luminously.

Engaging in a conversation with Nikki made it clear to me that her wisdom supersedes my abilities as a writer. Because of this, I decided to share the outcome of the interview in its full glory -- verbatim with no filtering, no watering down through my own interpretation. I happily reported to my husband later on that doing an interview with Nikki was, perhaps, one of the best experiences I’ve had my entire life.

So how does one become such a sage at a tender age of 21? Nikki has earned spots of coverage from Berkeley News for tackling substantive issues as hunger awareness, poverty and AIDS awareness campaigns. Nikki has also become a distinguished lecturer, invited to do a lecture for the 2010 high school class of Flintridge Sacred Heart Academy in La Canada, to inspire them towards a life of service. She has, under her belt, two fellowship grants to sustain her work for Likhaan and for Gawad Kalinga in the Philippines, addressing public health issues involving women. I highly doubt that all these blessings came only through a stroke of luck -- she has earned them, deservingly, by being true to her self and living the values she was raised with. And you are about to find out why, my dear readers.

Nikki: I keep thinking back to my parents, their ties to Catholicism, what I learned and picked up from them. We did not do volunteer work, but I found that in their work as journalists, I learned to find the truth of a story, to bring out the voice of the person they are talking to, to share that with their avid readers. I find that their search for truth finds my heart and the search of my truth now defines my life. I have found those in water polo, journalism and Amnesty International.

Nikki: In water polo, I became strong, team-oriented and waited for myself to come out. In this sport, I became assertive to reach my goals and not let others overcome me by their being aggressive. Before, with swimming, I was simply moving by myself and a race against the clock. With water polo, I was grabbed, punched, bit, and even my private parts were not spared. Of course, I shared those with the referee but it was a case of she said, I said. So, I learned to move forward, inspite of those. When someone hurt me, I did not cry. I decided I have to be stronger than the person who hurt me, not take things personally, and use what I have to go after the ball. I wasone of the few Filipinas in this school, so I did not have enough time to dwell on my feelings. I learned not to react with my body, but to think about what happened to me and save it for the next game. I showed the referee and the team that I learned how to ‘thicken my hide’. Of course, I learned teamwork.

Nikki: I went to a private school called Flintridge Sacred Heart Academy, most of the school population was white, some Asians and I was one of a handful of Filipinas. I realized my parents made this investment, never pushing me to join the activities, but I knew it was a lot, the tuition was even more than the tuition they now pay at UC Berkeley. Their teachings to me, the ethos was: as long as I am doing the best that I can, I can go out and explore the world. It is important to them that I have the Catholic tradition and their faith is really strong so from Our Lady of Lourdes Elementary School, I continued to Flintridge. So, I wanted to honor their investment.

Nikki: Yes, I think they should really get the best parenting award. It is like if someone marked you, if I were branded as a cow, I would like to be branded as Veritas. That is what I learned from my parents, finding the truth. I actually got the Veritas Award when I graduated from high school. To me, it is a meaningful award and it is given to someone who is committed to academics, service and search for the truth. Few years later, I sort of understood why they gave it to me, as a retreat leader, the words VERITAS stayed with me, I claimed those words as mine, and through global poverty and practice minor that I am taking now and also to public health, my major.

I felt even then, even before I got the award that the search for the truth was important, after I learned that from my parents, so I became the president of Amnesty International.

Nikki: I was reading the newspapers a lot. One day, I read about Hurricane Katrina. I saw the kind of poverty and racial tensions which exploded thereafter, I could not make sense of it, and when I saw it at that time, I saw something wrong with that picture. I also noticed Darfur was exploding. I was on top of this beautiful hill, in a beautiful school, in a beautiful building, but outside of that world, it seems some parts were tumbling down, where they have no choice of their own. I asked why is it that way, what can I do, I was moved by the pictures that I saw.