On August 9th, I was honored to perform a marriage ceremony for two Asian American friends. It was such a joyful occasion with a 9-course Chinese banquet and a beautiful wedding cake. Arthur and Young are a typical middle-class family. Arthur is a successful filmmaker. Young is a popular ESL teacher. They have an adopted son, Reed, who is 5 years old. Friends and family laughed and cried as Arthur and Young talked about what it’s like being together for 30 years. They remembered the times when they get on each other’s nerves, and most importantly, the times when they knew that no matter how difficult the situation, they could count on one another for unconditional support. But they were denied the ability to legalize a 30-year relationship because they were two males.
This year, Arthur and Young finally had the chance to marry and to enjoy all of the rights and responsibilities that come with being legally married, including caring for one another and their son. But Proposition 8 would take this all away. Not only would it invalidate Arthur and Young’s marriage, it would also write that position into our state constitution, making it extremely hard to change in the future.
I am urging the Asian American community to vote no on Prop 8 for the following reasons:
The Asian American community has always emphasized the importance of the family. Asian Americans have been able to survive harsh times in America because of the family. Sometimes, this definition of “family” took alternatives forms when large numbers of single men came with no family, and the family associations stepped in. Arthur and Young have found their definition of family. Why should we deny it to them?
Many Asian Americans have immigrated to America, fleeing persecution. They come to America because we have privacy and the freedom to have different religions, beliefs or political views. Today, America has some of the strongest privacy laws in the world. Why should we interfere with a marriage commitment that Arthur and Young are making to one another in their private life?
Asian Americans were the subject of the worst discriminatory laws in California, including being denied the ability to own land. In fact, over 125 years ago, the California State Legislature passed a law to specifically prohibit marriage between Asians and whites, because people did not like Asian immigrants. I find the discrimination against our community offensive. I know that I do not want that same kind of treatment given to other human beings in California. If I expect full and equal treatment to be given to me, then it is my responsibility to ensure that there is full and equal treatment for others.
The Yes on 8 Campaign is saying that gay marriage will have to be taught to children in the schools. This is not true. There is no mandate for marriage to have to be taught in the schools at all. The only legal requirement in California state law says that if sex education is taught, then we should teach respect for marriage and committed relationships. In addition, even if it were taught, in contrast to Massachusetts, parents in California can ask that their child be excused from attendance from any health and family instruction that they don’t agree with. The Yes campaign is also saying that churches might be sued if gay marriage is not eliminated. This is also not true – churches right now have the right to refuse to marry any couples, including gay couples, and that right is not affected by Prop 8 in any way.
The truth is that 2 people who have been together for 30 years should be something that brings about great joy. Prop 8 would take that all away. Does that seem fair to you? Please don’t take that away from Arthur and Young. Do the right thing. Please Vote No on Prop 8.
| < Prev | Next > |
|---|
